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Messages - Crasdo

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Sub Slave Intros / Re: Looking for control
« on: July 15, 2015, 01:53:14 AM »
Yeah, four days isn't that long, but it's a start, and it really only takes two days or so to start to feel way more submissive to women! But trust me, I am on edge enough as it is!

That sounds so pathetic, not only is cumming a privilege that needs to be paid for, but begging to cum without even knowing if permission will be granted is a privilege that must be paid for too! That's about as pathetic as it gets, and the idea turns me on, but hurts me at the same time! And a bunch of girls laughing? Do they get a say in deciding if you give permission?

The bathroom control just sounds terrible, to be honest I think I'm really not interested in that.

I have no experiences with Findom. I've met a few online keyholders through various websites, but it was all free and just for fun ("fun"), and nothing ever lasted very long. But I tried to compensate my holders with stories of my feelings, fantasies, or sometimes even non-kink things if we had mutual interests. Unfortunately, the unpaid Dommes often lose interest and I've decided to come here to find not only a longer-term Domme, but to experience the submission of paying for it, and to really make my Domme happy. There's a big difference between being a woman's two-week plaything, and actually being long-term controlled, paying for the privilege to beg to cum, maybe even to just be denied because it makes her happy.

What are your experiences with chastity? How long do your typical slaves have to wait? What's your record?
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Sub Slave Intros / Re: Looking for control
« on: July 14, 2015, 12:05:01 PM »
Jerking off definitely becomes a privilege that the Mistress controls. If many people feel as though it's a right, it is because they have always been able to do it whenever they want. When I am not in chastity or controlled at all, I still feel it is a right. But I've been self-locked in chastity for about four days as I type this, and it currently is most-definitely not!

I also find the psychology interesting, although I've never personally experienced true submission. It's disappointing that so many "slaves" only see you and other mistresses as a hopeful peep show. One of the reasons that chastity intrigues me so much is that even if I am just in the mood for a peep show, once I close the lock it all changes. Short-term, I physically cannot jerk off, so the peep show loses its purpose. Long-term (really just after a day or two of going to bed without relief), my feelings and desires morph. I don't fantasize about stroking to a peep show anymore. I fantasize about seeing a Woman looking down at me, smiling or laughing at what I just did to please her, while my cock goes ignored, maybe even roughly compressed into its little cage. Sure I get horny and really want to stroke (as I do now!), but it's truly a secondary urge to pleasing her. I once had an online keyholder who gave me permission to orgasm after about ten days, but her message seemed like she was just doing it out of pity for me. I remember my hands shaking as, instead of just stroking right away, I typed up a message begging her to please deny my for longer if that is what would make her happier. She let me out right then anyway, but I surprised myself that day--begging for more suffering if that was what would make her happy!

I definitely respect that you do not provide ease or nude cam shows. It helps reinforce the feeling of submission when the Domme can see the slave in any way, whenever she wants, but the slave can only see the fully clothed Domme, and on her own terms.

As far as my expectations, I'm still not entirely sure because I've never had a complete owner or Mistress. I think I would desire daily communication and maybe some kind of assignment to make her happy. It wouldn't have to be a teasing or paying assignment, sometimes maybe telling a story or fantasy. The other thing is upfront expectations for what is required of me (regular tribute, any special tributes for stroking or similar, etc). I've found a lot of FinDommes online seem as fake as a lot of the slaves and just want to ride their slaves for an easy dollar. I guess I would want to go slow and, at least at first, have some sort of known system for what we're both getting into.

I've been submissive for a long time, I think I really noticed it with my first girlfriend who would sometimes ballbust me, or practice self-defence moves. It was always more fun than sexual for her, but it turned me on how easily she could send me to the ground or make me beg.

Thank you for taking the time to write to me, Mistress Bella, I look forward to reading your response (and will probably be thinking about it all day at work!).
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Sub Slave Intros / Re: Looking for control
« on: July 13, 2015, 11:01:16 PM »
Heh, ok you got me, I have definitely fantasized about it in exquisite detail...

And yes, you are correct, for a slave it is a privilege to whack off. I think of it as a right because for normal men it is, and it always has been for me. But the more I fall into the realm of submission, and especially if I find a Domme, it becomes a privilege that I must earn.

You're probably correct about me being weak on the inside. For as long as I can remember I've thought about being a slave, about having someone above me to decide what I can and cannot do, and what I must do for them to make their life easier. The idea just feels right to me and turns me on, and now I'm finally here, taking what I hope will be the first step to filling that hole in my life.
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Sub Slave Intros / Looking for control
« on: July 11, 2015, 03:01:17 AM »
Hey, I'm new here, but I've always kind of fantasized of having a woman take complete control of me. I really like findom and chastity, especially when combined. The idea of having to pay a dominant woman just for the right to stroke myself is such a humiliating and demoralizing idea, but the helplessness turns me on! It sounds weird, but hopefully I can find a woman here who is interested in the same things and would like to control me. Please message me if that is you!
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