Findoms Community

I very well understand what you mean Nigel. And yes it is a strong fantasy of mine too. The line between fantasy and reality can be a very thin one at times, yet when it comes to putting it all out there, that line can be quite the barrier as well. The trouble for us is we dread what we crave. When my Mistress allows me to play with myself, often my most violent orgasm is to fantasies of losing control to a mean and dominant, perhaps even crazy and psychotic Woman.

i've only experimented with my own poo. And felt sick for a few hours afterward. And I only did it to punish myself for something stupid i had done that day.

Have you eaten poo from more than one person Nige? Or was this Your one and only experience, not counting your diaper fun?

I guess the trouble i have Nige is that if i initiate the blackmail, then yes it really is cheating. But then again how else can it start without me consenting to it? I guess that's the conundrum. But being judged against one another does sound enticing and conjures up all sorts of forced-bi fantasies lol. Imagine being a hetero slave, blackmailed into serving another slave who is deemed better than you? Kind of ramps up the humiliation to another level, doesn't it?

But in the meantime i am happy to just contribute to this forum, help Mistress Bella try and get it off the ground, as ordered, without condemning myself to blackmail slavery to Her and roll the dice of not having any other Dominant, whether it be Bella or anyone else, forcing my hand. My loyalties do lay with my existing Mistress, no matter how disenchanted i might seem or am with Her.

Mistress Bella, i thank You for Your reply. Yes we have crossed paths obviously, i guess i was only curious not because we already know each other, but just wondered if i had done or said anything not to warrant Your usual greeting.

Woman's Feet have totally defined my Life. I guess it's pretty sad in a way. That i have let a simple fetish so hopelessly consume me and dominate me to a point where my entire sexual being exists at the whim of anyone willing to wave their Feet in my face, or above me, or at me is a sad truth. Often I sit back now days and wonder how my life might have been if I was more 'normal'. I might be married, probably with a mortgage I guess like millions of unhappy people the World over. Just living the daily grind of 9-5. Maybe the way i have turned out is for the best?

At different times I wonder? How nice it might be to go home at night and have someone to talk to, or hug in difficult times or laugh with. But how good is it to not have that responsibility instead knowing all I need to concern myself with is to keep a pair of Feet i am serving at the time, or the Mistress they belong to, most happy.

I believe I was born with this fetish. I first remember noticing it as an 8 or 9 year old hopelessly staring at the bottom of the white socks my school mates were wearing when we were forced to take off our shoes in the school library. How I loved the dirty ones! It is a fetish that remains with me now, on the dawn of my 40th birthday. Since then and for a couple of decades before starting to act out on my fetish I would deliberately stare at a Girl's Feet, and specifically hoping to get a glimpse of soles, in the blind faith that i might get caught and hopelessly humiliated as a result. God, so many fantasies of times I'd stare and wish I'd get caught and what might have happened to me if i did.

Then, not that long ago, i started to act on these fantasies. You see i have always been intimidated by Girls. Ever since school I was naturally shy and nervous and wouldn't know how to approach them so quite simply wouldn't. I suppose this goes hand in hand with my genuinely submissive nature. Of course these fears were then exacerbated once girls as teenagers knew they could intimidate me and bully me. I was very popular in school, a funny guy, so I probably attracted more attention than most and with this attention came talk of which girls were interested in me and who i would get with which given my hidden desire for Feet and to be dominated just made me more and more uncomfortable.

So in the past five years i stopped masturbating to the things I hoped might happen to me, and instead made them happen. I am still too nervous to approach girls in a 'normal' situation but now with the internet, and Craigslist, and prostitutes willing to indulge me i have very quickly made up for lost ground.

So how much do I like Feet? Well I have let my fetish for them rule my entire life, not just my sexual being, so I would say i like them more than what has been healthy for me. And, yes, now I look back I probably regret my lack of control and wish I were more 'normal'.